THESIS STATEMENT DRAFT #3

1. http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail?vid=3&hid=111&sid=73650a7c-18be-4690-b713-317f1baf2cf2%40sessionmgr104&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZQ%3d%3d#db=a9h&AN=44677029#db=a9h&AN=44677029
2. http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail?vid=4&hid=105&sid=73650a7c-18be-4690-b713-317f1baf2cf2%40sessionmgr104&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZQ%3d%3d#db=a9h&AN=J0E374946123409
3. http://web.ebscohost.com/ehost/detail?vid=5&hid=105&sid=73650a7c-18be-4690-b713-317f1baf2cf2%40sessionmgr104&bdata=JnNpdGU9ZWhvc3QtbGl2ZQ%3d%3d#db=a9h&AN=J0E127571833509

New thesis paragraph:

Laws for teenage driving should be stricter to decrease the leading cause of teenage death. By getting their license at a young age, teenage drivers do not fully understand the responsibility of driving and are therefore reckless drivers. They commit unlawful actions like text messaging, talking on the phone, speeding, and driving under the influence, while putting both their lives and lives of others in danger. Coincidentally, laws already exist to prevent these types of actions, like “The Teen Driver Cell Phone Ban” in California, but they are not strongly enforced and the punishment is a small fine. This needs to change, the laws need to be strongly enforced and the punishment for anyone caught committing an offense should be more severe. If you are caught text messaging or talking on the phone, you should get a fine of $500 and get your license suspended for one month. If you are driving under the influence, you should be given a fine of $2,500 and get your license revoked for 12 months. If you are speeding, you should be given a fine of $750 and depending on how fast you are going your license should be taken away. For every 5 mph you are over, your license should be suspended an extra month. With stricter laws in place for teenage driving, more teenage lives and lives of others would be saved.

Old thesis paragraph:

Laws for teenage driver should be stricter to decrease the leading cause of teenage death. By getting their license at a young age, teenage drivers do not fully understand the responsibility of driving and are therefore reckless drivers. They commit unlawful actions, like text messaging, talking on the phone, speeding, and even driving under the influence, while driving and put their lives and lives of others in danger. In some states, like the State of California, laws already exist to prevent these types of action, but they are not strongly enforced or the punishment is a small fine. This needs to change, the laws need to be strongly enforced and the punishment for anyone caught committing an offense should be more severe. If you are caught using your cell phone to text message or to talk to someone, you should get a fine of $500 and get your license suspended for one month. If you are driving under the influence, you should be given a fine of $1500 and get your license suspended for 12 months. If you are speeding, you should be given a fine of $750 and depending on how fast you are going your license should be suspended. Ever 5 mph you are over, you license should be suspended an extra month. With stricter laws in place for teenage driving more teenage lives and lives of others would be saved.

NEW LITERACY

REVISED:
In the article “Clive Thompson on the New Literacy”, Thompson writes about how technology has an big impact on our writing. I agree with Andrea Lunsford, a Professor at Stanford University, who believes “technology isn't killing our ability to write, it's reviving it.” With the internet, people in today’s world write more often than before. With social networking websites like Facebook and chats online, it has allowed people to communicate with text then in earlier generations. In today’s world, professor Lunsford realized that when students write for an audience it “gives them a different sense of what constitutes good writing.” With a class assignment, students consider the professor not to be an audience therefore; they are “less enthusiastic about their in-class writing.” With the internet reviving the way we write, “Knowing who you're writing for and why you're writing might be the most crucial factor of all.”

As a teen in today's world it is true that technology is the new literacy of today's world. Everyday, its seems that everything i do has to do with some form or technology. Basically, technology rules the world. I believe that if there was not this much technology not that many people will write. Technology gives you the opportunity to read and especially write more. If its a text message, a blog response, or a chat response you are still creating some form of writing. It may seem that old traditional reading are becoming extinct like the newspaper, but with new technology people would be able to access the same newspaper on the internet or on the go with their cell phones. to me, new technology is the best way.
Question:
1. Is this article any different than the other articles we have read?
2. Do you agree that “technology isn't killing our ability to write, it's reviving it” or is it actually killing our ability to write.
3. Is the internet to really blame for the change in writing?


----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

OLD:

In the article “Clive Thompson on the New Literacy”, Thompson writes about how technology has an impact on our writing. I agree with Andrea Lunsford, a Professor at Stanford University, who believes “technology isn't killing our ability to write, it's reviving it.” With the internet, people in today’s world write more often than before. With social networking websites like Facebook and chats online, it has allowed people to communicate with text then in earlier generations. In today’s world, professor Lunsford realized that when students write for an audience it “gives them a different sense of what constitutes good writing.” With a class assignment, students consider the professor not to be an audience therefore; they are “less enthusiastic about their in-class writing.” With the internet reviving the way we write, “Knowing who you're writing for and why you're writing might be the most crucial factor of all.”
Question:
1. Is this article any different than the other articles we have read?
2. Do you agree that “technology isn't killing our ability to write, it's reviving it” or is it actually killing our ability to write.
3. Is the internet to really blame for the change in writing?